My thought life reminds me of a child's. I think about God and what He must be like, and then I think about what I'm going to fix for dinner. I'm either a clandestine ADD or I'm normal. For me to focus on something takes concentration. I'm a doer, and I love to see what I've done. I want to get "on" with whatever I do. It's hard for me to "soak." (Soaking is a relatively new term in Christianity for an ancient practice. The term, "soaking,"means to immerse oneself in the awareness of God's love. ) Soaking requires stillness --at least in the heart. It's not about outward movement, but inward "beholding."
You can say whatever you want about the Toronto Blessing, but Toronto is where God finally caught up with me. In November of 1994, I went there with my husband, my son and a few friends. It was the first time I really succumbed to the urge to yield my outer man to God, when I did, I fell on the floor and God began to speak to me. Not with an audible voice, but with an auditory impression. He said those words that everyone longs to hear from the lips of God: "Well, I finally got you where I want you!"
God wanted me down. He wanted me to be still. I had been trying to serve Him with my own efforts, completely throwing myself into planting a church! I didn't realize it then, but I was going about it with my human strength which was a slave to my carnal thoughts. God could have thousands of congregations if He wanted them; but now I knew that it wasn't what I could DO that he wanted, it was me.
Lying there I began to sense that God was so much bigger than me. He just wanted me to look at Him. I've spent the last twenty years in and out of my own awareness of God's presence, but He has always been aware of my presence. In fact, He's on the inside of me, looking out at my surroundings and my friends and acquaintances. He knows them all and how to "get them where He wants them."
When I am still, just for a moment, I stop doing things my way and just rest in the fact that He loves me. He's got the Heavenly Agenda and doesn't need my help. He just wants me to love Him and because I now know that, He wants me to simply love the folks around me. If I can do that, I start flowing in His power which accomplishes His agenda. If I love the people around me, His love is the foundation for experiencing His power and seeing Him do what He wants in the lives of other people.
Love is the invisible thread sewing the kingdom of Heaven together. It's visible only to God.
You can say whatever you want about the Toronto Blessing, but Toronto is where God finally caught up with me. In November of 1994, I went there with my husband, my son and a few friends. It was the first time I really succumbed to the urge to yield my outer man to God, when I did, I fell on the floor and God began to speak to me. Not with an audible voice, but with an auditory impression. He said those words that everyone longs to hear from the lips of God: "Well, I finally got you where I want you!"
God wanted me down. He wanted me to be still. I had been trying to serve Him with my own efforts, completely throwing myself into planting a church! I didn't realize it then, but I was going about it with my human strength which was a slave to my carnal thoughts. God could have thousands of congregations if He wanted them; but now I knew that it wasn't what I could DO that he wanted, it was me.
Lying there I began to sense that God was so much bigger than me. He just wanted me to look at Him. I've spent the last twenty years in and out of my own awareness of God's presence, but He has always been aware of my presence. In fact, He's on the inside of me, looking out at my surroundings and my friends and acquaintances. He knows them all and how to "get them where He wants them."
When I am still, just for a moment, I stop doing things my way and just rest in the fact that He loves me. He's got the Heavenly Agenda and doesn't need my help. He just wants me to love Him and because I now know that, He wants me to simply love the folks around me. If I can do that, I start flowing in His power which accomplishes His agenda. If I love the people around me, His love is the foundation for experiencing His power and seeing Him do what He wants in the lives of other people.
Love is the invisible thread sewing the kingdom of Heaven together. It's visible only to God.
What are you building? God would much rather you stop building and start beholding. "But we all with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of The Lord, are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory..."( Corinthians 3:18) When you behold Him, what you build will be totally different from what you thought you should build. It may not even be visible to anyone else but Him.
I'm trying to learn to be content with that because that's what takes real faith. What if you devote your whole life to love? Maybe then we could stop spinning our own designs out of the visible threads that everyone else uses and do it only for Him. He would probably love that. What do you think?
I'm trying to learn to be content with that because that's what takes real faith. What if you devote your whole life to love? Maybe then we could stop spinning our own designs out of the visible threads that everyone else uses and do it only for Him. He would probably love that. What do you think?
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